Intrusive thoughts therapy Copenhagen
Help to stop being frightened of your own mind
I help you say the unsayable thought out loud and take its power back
- Last updated October 15, 2026
What I want you to know about the thoughts you cannot tell anyone
In this short video, I explain why a frightening thought is not a hidden wish, and why speaking it aloud to someone who does not flinch is often where relief begins.
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At a glance
Intrusive thoughts therapy Copenhagen helps you when unwanted, disturbing thoughts or images keep forcing their way into your mind and frighten you about who you might be. You see me on your own, for 1-hour appointments with 50 minutes of therapy, in central Copenhagen or online, and you can speak English or Danish, whichever makes the hardest thoughts easier to say.
I help you bring the thoughts into the open without shame, understand why your mind keeps producing them and loosen the cycle of checking, avoiding and self-accusation that keeps them alive. Intrusive thoughts are one form of anxiety therapy, within my wider psychotherapy.
You do not have to name the thought to get started. Ask for a free discovery call, book a session, check my client policy on confidentiality, or send me a short note.
Is this the right page for you?
This is for you if…
Intrusive thoughts therapy Copenhagen is for adults who are troubled by unwanted thoughts or images that feel shocking, violent, sexual or against everything they believe in. Usually the thoughts frighten you precisely because they are so far from who you want to be. You want to stop living in fear of your own mind and to understand what is going on.
- You get a sudden image of harming someone you love, and it horrifies you so much that you go cold and shaky.
- You avoid holding the kitchen knife, standing near the platform edge or bathing your baby alone, in case the thought means something.
- You have a thought that clashes with your faith, your values or your sexuality, and you cannot stop asking what it says about you.
- You keep checking your memory, your feelings or the news to make sure you have not done something terrible.
- You have never told anyone the exact content of the thoughts, because you fear they would look at you differently.
- You try hard to push the thought away, and it comes back stronger, often at the very moments you most want peace.
- You feel that a good person would never think such things, and the shame has started to colour how you see yourself.
- You have read enough to suspect the thoughts are common, yet part of you still fears that you are the exception.
This is probably not for you if…
Not every unwanted thought belongs to this page. If your experience sounds more like one of these, the linked page fits it more closely.
- Your mind goes round and round ordinary decisions and conversations, rather than producing shocking thoughts. → overthinking therapy
- Your fear is spread across your body and your days, and the unwanted thoughts are only a small part of it. → anxiety therapy
- Sudden physical surges of fear, with a racing heart and a sense of losing control, are your main problem. → panic attack therapy
- The thoughts are memories of something that really happened to you and keep replaying. → trauma therapy
- The thoughts mostly concern humiliating yourself in front of other people. → social anxiety therapy
- You want to understand yourself and your life more broadly, beyond these thoughts. → psychotherapy
- The thoughts are about your partner or relationship, and your partner is willing to come with you. → couples therapy
- You are in immediate danger, or you are thinking about ending your life. Please call 112, or 1813 for urgent mental health help in the Capital Region.
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Client reviews
The reviews shown here are shared by clients who have worked with me in therapy and chosen to reflect on their experience. They are collected via Google and displayed through an independent verification service, offering an open and transparent picture of how my work is experienced.
Mark’s view
“Looking back over my 22 years of practice, the most painful part of intrusive thoughts is rarely the thoughts themselves. It is the years people spend carrying them in secret. I have met many people who were sure they were the only one, and who had never said the words out loud to anyone. Underneath the secrecy I hear ‘If they knew what goes on in my head, would they still want me?’ and, just as often, ‘This is mine to deal with. Nobody needs to see it.’ Some people want desperately to confess and dread being seen in the same breath. My view is firm: a thought spoken to someone who does not flinch loses much of its grip.”
Mark Colclough, MA, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
Meet Mark, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
I am Mark Colclough, MA, a psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist specialising in expats and international couples. I work in English and Danish, from my practice in central Copenhagen and online.
Practising since 2004, I bring a bicultural perspective to work with individuals and couples across languages and cultural contexts. My work integrates depth-oriented psychotherapy with approaches such as integral psychotherapy, Gestalt therapy, Jungian psychoanalysis, and object relations theory. I also have specialist training in attachment theory, narcissism, and borderline personality disorder.
For support with life between cultures, explore expat psychotherapy or expat couples therapy. My practice is supported by ongoing training and supervision. To read more about my background, training, and approach, visit About me.
The importance of supervision
Good therapy begins with good supervision
I regularly meet with experienced senior psychotherapists in Denmark and abroad to reflect on my work, challenge my thinking, and continue developing my skills. This ongoing process supports the quality of my individual and couples therapy, helping me offer thoughtful, ethical, and effective care.
My focus is simple: excellence, integrity, and impact.
Connect with me:
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You are welcome to get in touch. We can clarify what’s the right therapy for you.
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A typical situation
Ingrid is 31, a nurse and the mother of a 4-month-old boy. One evening, while changing him, she had a sudden picture of dropping him down the stairs. Since then she carries him only when her husband is home, keeps away from the stairwell and lies awake checking whether she is a danger. She loves her son fiercely. She has not told her husband or her health visitor, because she is terrified they would take the baby away.
I would start by letting Ingrid tell me the thought in her own words and showing her that I am not alarmed by it. In a first session like this, people often discover that the horror they feel is itself a sign of how much they care, and that the avoidance has been feeding the fear.
I have presented this clinical example as a compound of 22 years of clinical practice.
This is when you need intrusive thoughts therapy with me
You have tried to argue the thoughts away, pray them away or simply keep busy, and they keep coming back.
There is no single right time or right reason to come to therapy for intrusive thoughts. If a thought has started to dictate where you go, what you touch or who you are alone with, if you are losing sleep to checking and self-doubt, or if you simply feel you cannot carry it alone any longer, that is enough. You can come without a label for what is happening and without being able to say the thought out loud yet. In more than 22 years of practice, I have heard almost every kind of frightening thought, and I recognise when an ordinary quirk of the mind has turned into a cycle that needs professional attention.
My professional view is that the thought itself is rarely the real problem. What keeps it alive is what you do to get rid of it. I will help you identify that cycle, understand what feeds it and decide what needs to change. The 6 questions below describe how this cycle usually feels from the inside, so you can see whether it matches yours.
Are you rearranging your days to avoid a thought?
If you are, it is time to take it seriously. Intrusive thoughts often show themselves less in the thought and more in the detours. You hand someone else the knife. You stay away from the edge of the metro platform. You avoid being alone with a child, a partner or an elderly parent. You leave the room when certain images are on television. Each detour brings a moment of relief and then makes the thought feel more dangerous, so the detours grow.
I would look at how much of your life the thought now controls, how long this has been going on and whether it rises in particular periods, such as after a birth, a move or a loss. That tells us whether this is a passing phase under pressure or a settled pattern that will not ease without help. If this is where you are, book a session with me and we can look at it calmly together.
Do you want the thought gone, and yet keep checking it is still there?
Many people with intrusive thoughts do this, and it makes sense once you see what each side is trying to do. One part of you wants the thought to disappear for good. Another part feels it must stay on guard and keep testing whether the thought is still there, whether it still feels wrong, whether you still react with horror. Both parts are trying to keep you and others safe. Together they keep the thought at the centre of your attention.
I do not treat either part as defective. In psychosynthesis, we work with these as parts of you, each with a protective job. I help you see what the guarding part is afraid would happen if it stopped watching, and what the part that wants peace is longing for. When you understand both, you can begin to let the thought come and go without fighting it or checking it.
Do you need someone to tell you that you are not a bad person?
Many people do, and the need can be relentless. You may ask your partner whether they think you could ever hurt anyone, search online for stories that sound like yours or confess half of the thought to a friend to see how they react. The relief comes quickly and fades quickly. Soon the doubt returns, and you need to hear it again, sometimes several times a day.
Your wish to be seen as good, and to feel safe with the people you love, is legitimate, and I will not shame it. What I help you change is the alarm that insists on proof before you can rest. We look at the older fear underneath, often of being unlovable or of being cast out if anyone saw all of you. Then we practise living with the doubt for a while instead of needing it settled at once, and asking for closeness in other ways than reassurance.
Do you long to tell someone, and then shut down the moment you start?
Yes, this is very common, and it can be confusing for you and the people close to you. You decide to tell your partner, sit down beside them, begin to speak and then go blank, change the subject or turn it into a joke. You want someone to know the full weight of what you carry. You also fear their face changing, their trust ending or their worry taking over. So you stay half known.
I help you slow this moment down in the room, so we can see exactly what happens between wanting to be known and closing the door. Usually it is a specific fear, such as being seen as dangerous or losing someone’s love. I have real compassion for that protection. I will also help you find a way to tell the people who matter what you need them to know, at a pace you can manage, and to take responsibility for not leaving them guessing.
Do you keep your distance from the people you are most afraid of hurting?
Many people with intrusive thoughts do this quietly. You hold your baby less, hug your partner less or keep a careful distance from a parent, a pupil or a patient. You become practical and busy, and you tell yourself it is better this way. It gives you a sense of control, and it protects the people you love from a danger that exists mostly in the thought. The cost is that you lose the closeness you most want, and they may feel rejected without knowing why.
My view is that this distance is doing an important job for you, and I will not shame it. I help you understand what it protects, so you can come back towards the people you love a step at a time without feeling overwhelmed. You learn to tell them, in your own words, that you need a moment, rather than simply disappearing. Space is fine. A wall built from a thought usually is not.
Has the thought made you doubt who you really are?
This is often the deepest pain. When a thought attacks what you hold most dear, your love for a child, your faith, your sexuality or your gentleness, you may start to wonder whether your whole sense of yourself is a lie. You comb through your past for evidence. You feel ashamed of a mind you did not choose. That doubt does not mean your identity is damaged. It usually means the thought has landed exactly where you care most.
I help you look at what the thought is targeting and why, and to tell the difference between what your mind produces and who you are. Sometimes that leads into family history and into rules about goodness and badness passed down through generations. I will challenge you when you treat a thought as a verdict, and I will not hand you a new identity. The aim is to know more clearly what you value and to live by it without fear.
If you recognise yourself here, request a free call to talk it through, or book a session if you already know you want to start.
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What intrusive thoughts therapy with me will help you do
Understanding that the thoughts are not wishes is a relief, but the work also has to change what you avoid, check and hide.
Intrusive thoughts therapy with me will help you understand what your mind is doing, see the cycle of fear, avoidance and checking that keeps the thoughts strong and make changes you can feel at home, at work and with the people you love. Knowing that intrusive thoughts are common often helps for a day or 2. On its own, that knowledge rarely ends the cycle.
In more than 22 years of practice, I have learned that this work moves when I take an active role. I will not simply nod while you tell me you are probably fine. I will ask you to say what you have never said, tell you what I see and challenge the habits that keep the fear alive. These 6 questions describe what we work towards.
How will I help you see what your intrusive thoughts are really about?
I help you separate the thought from the meaning you have given it. The image of harm, the blasphemous phrase or the unwanted sexual thought is one thing. The conclusion that you must be dangerous, wicked or secretly different is another. Underneath, you will usually find strong feelings that have nowhere to go: anger you are not allowed to feel, exhaustion you cannot admit, love so intense that losing it is unthinkable, or rules about being good that you absorbed very early.
I bring structure to this. I tell you what I think is feeding the cycle, which reactions deserve attention first and which explanations keep you stuck, such as “if I think it, part of me must want it”. I work with conscious and unconscious material, including dreams and the body, so we are not only arguing with the thought. When you are ready, book a session with me and we will begin.
How can you notice the spiral before it takes hold?
You can learn to notice the moment after the thought arrives, and that moment is where change begins. The thought itself may be instant and impossible to stop. What follows is a sequence: a jolt of horror, a surge of heat, a question about what it means, an urge to check, confess or avoid. Once you can feel that sequence starting, you have a choice about whether to follow it.
In sessions, I help you slow it down until you can see each step: what was happening just before, what the thought latched on to and what you did next. Recognition is not enough. Together we practise letting the thought be there without answering it, in the room and between sessions, until you can do it while you are actually holding the knife, standing on the platform or sitting beside your child.
How can you calm the horror the thought sets off?
Calming the horror does not mean pretending you do not care or forcing yourself to feel nothing. It means staying present enough to notice that the thought is a thought, that your body is reacting as if it were a real danger and that you can choose how to respond. My article on intrusive thoughts explains why the mind does this in more detail.
I help you notice the physical alarm earlier and understand what your nervous system is bracing against. We find simple, specific ways of letting the alarm rise and fall without acting on it. Most of the change happens in the days between our sessions, when you practise this on your own. A few minutes a day of allowing the thought, rather than escaping it, will do more than any reassurance I can give you.
How can you tell people what you need without confessing everything?
Clear communication starts with knowing what you feel and need, and what is yours to share. With intrusive thoughts, it is easy to swing between total silence and anxious confession, where you tell people every new thought so that they can tell you it is fine. Neither gives you what you actually need, which is support without handing over your peace of mind.
I help you find words that are honest, specific and proportionate, such as telling your partner that you are struggling with frightening thoughts and need patience, without asking them to judge each one. I will challenge you when you hide completely, and also when you make others responsible for settling every doubt. We can rehearse these conversations in the room until they feel possible.
How can you decide what to do without being ruled by what the thought might mean?
Decisions become clearer when you separate what you know and value from what the thought threatens. People with intrusive thoughts often make big choices to stay safe from them: giving up a job with children, not having a second baby, staying away from church or avoiding intimacy. Fear makes these choices feel sensible, even when they cost you a great deal.
I help you look honestly at each choice: what you would decide if the thought were not there, and what you are giving up to keep it quiet. I will give you my professional view, and I will tell you when I think avoidance is making the decision for you. I will not decide for you.
What does life look like when the thoughts no longer set the rules?
Lasting change has to reach your ordinary days. The test is whether you can cook dinner, bathe your child, drive across a bridge or go to a service without negotiating with your mind first. You may still have odd or unpleasant thoughts, as everyone does. The difference is that they pass through rather than move in. You may need to rebuild routines you gave up, return to places you avoided and allow closeness you have held back.
We sort out together which habits of checking and avoiding should go and which parts of your character should stay. Your conscience, your care for others and your wish to be good are not the problem, and the goal is not to remove them. The goal is to live with more freedom and less fear, so that your choices follow your values rather than the thought of the day.
You can also send me an email
What happens when you begin intrusive thoughts therapy with me
You do not need to have told anyone before, or to be ready to say everything at once. We start with how the thoughts affect your days now and what you would most like to get back.
When you begin, I listen carefully, help you name the cycle that costs you most and give the work a clear direction. You decide how much of the thought you share and when. Many people find that saying it in a calm room, to someone who does not react with alarm, is already a relief. I do not expect a diagnosis or your whole history in order.
Intrusive thoughts therapy is a focused form of psychotherapy, structured individual work in which we look at your inner life and your relationships together. If the thoughts are tangled up in your relationship and your partner is willing to take part, couples therapy offers long-term relational development and healing. If you expect to need a series of sessions, my therapy discounts and bundles lower the cost and keep you committed when the fear says stop.
What happens in our first session about intrusive thoughts?
In our first session, I ask what brought you now, what the thoughts are like in general terms, what you do when they come and what you have stopped doing because of them. You choose how much detail to give. I also ask when it began, because these thoughts often start around a big change. You do not need to tell me your life story first.
By the end, I give you my first understanding of the cycle and propose a direction. You decide whether my way of working feels right for you. If a full session feels like a big step, a free 30-minute discovery call lets you test how it feels to talk to me.
When is individual psychotherapy the right choice for intrusive thoughts?
Individual work is right when the thoughts live mainly in you: in your fear, your shame, your history and the way you protect yourself and others. That is true for most intrusive thoughts, even when they are about the people you love most. It also gives you a private space to say things you are not yet ready to say at home.
On your own with me, you have someone who keeps track of the cycle week by week and who will gently point out when reassurance-seeking slips back in. If the thoughts are only one part of what you want to look at, my page on psychotherapy in Copenhagen describes how I work with a whole life.
When is couples therapy a better choice than working on intrusive thoughts alone?
Coming as a couple makes more sense when the thoughts have started to shape the relationship as much as your own mind. If your thoughts keep circling whether you really love your partner, if your avoidance has created distance or hurt between you, or if trust has been damaged by secrecy, the pattern lives between you as well as inside you.
In couples work, I help you both see the cycle you have fallen into, take responsibility for your own part and build more secure ways of being together. That is more than settling one worry. Couples therapy Copenhagen is long-term relational development and healing. Many people start alone, get steadier, and then bring their partner in.
How often should you come for intrusive thoughts therapy?
The right pace depends on how much the thoughts now control your life, how much room you have and how much continuity the work needs. Because avoidance grows quickly, long gaps between sessions often let it take back ground you have won. A steady rhythm usually helps most at the start.
My recommendation is to begin weekly. I will tell you honestly if sessions are too far apart for change to hold, and when the work is ready to become less frequent. If the thoughts have become overwhelming this week, acute psychotherapy lets us begin within days.
When does a bundle make sense for intrusive thoughts therapy?
A bundle makes sense when you know the work will take several sessions and you want continuity instead of deciding after each appointment whether to come back. With intrusive thoughts, the urge to stop often rises just when the work starts touching what you fear most. A planned course protects you from quitting at that point.
Booking a run of sessions ahead lowers the price of each one and makes it harder for fear to talk you into stopping. I will help you judge whether one fits the likely scope of your work. The sizes and terms are set out on therapy discounts and bundles, and in the cards further down this page.
How will we know when intrusive thoughts therapy has done its job?
Therapy has done its job when the thoughts no longer decide where you go, what you do or how close you let people come, and when you can manage without the same support. An unwelcome thought may still visit. You recognise it, let it pass and carry on with your day.
I review progress with you openly, and I do not encourage dependency or endless therapy. Sessions can become less frequent, pause or end when the work has done what it needed to. If a new thought or a new stage of life brings you back later, that does not mean the earlier work failed.
How it works with me
- Begin with a free 30-minute call, or go ahead and book your first session. You do not need to describe the thoughts in your message. A line saying you struggle with unwanted thoughts is enough.
- The first appointment is one hour long, 50 minutes of it therapy, in private with me at Møntergade 4 in central Copenhagen or by video, in English or Danish. There are times between 08:00 and 21:00 Copenhagen time on every day of the week, whenever a slot is open.
- We usually meet weekly at first. Step by step, you return to some of what you have been avoiding, at a pace we agree on together.
- Every few sessions, we look honestly at how much ground you have taken back. Together we decide whether to keep the pace, space sessions out or finish.
- If you expect several sessions, a therapy bundle saves you 10 per cent and gives you a clear plan from the start. You can see the bundles just below.
Save with a prepaid session bundle
How the bundle works
- Current bundle savings are shown on the Pricing page.
- Your bundle is valid for 180 days from the date of purchase.
- The bundle can only be used for the type of session stated on your invoice.
- If you request a refund, sessions already used are recalculated at the standard single-session price.
- The administration fee applied to a bundle refund is shown on the Pricing page.
- VAT follows the type of therapy included in the bundle: VAT-exempt sessions remain VAT exempt, while VAT-liable sessions include applicable VAT.
Compare with nearby options
Not sure intrusive thoughts therapy is the right starting point? Here is how it compares with the options people with frightening thoughts most often consider.
| Option | Choose it when | Pace |
|---|---|---|
| Intrusive thoughts therapy (this page) | Unwanted, shocking thoughts or images frighten you about who you are. | Weekly 1-hour sessions at first |
| Overthinking therapy | Your mind loops endlessly on ordinary decisions and conversations. | Weekly 1-hour sessions at first |
| Anxiety therapy | Worry and tension fill your days in many forms, not mainly through thoughts. | Weekly 1-hour sessions at first |
| Trauma therapy | The images come from something that really happened to you. | A steady, longer course of sessions |
Frequently asked questions
What is intrusive thoughts therapy with you?
Intrusive thoughts therapy with me is individual psychotherapy for adults troubled by unwanted thoughts or images that feel violent, sexual, blasphemous or against their values. It helps you understand why your mind produces these thoughts, why they frighten you so much and how the cycle of avoiding and checking keeps them strong. You can have it in English or Danish, at my practice in central Copenhagen or online from home.
I work in depth and without judgement, with your feelings, your body, your history and the rules about goodness you grew up with. Intrusive thoughts therapy is a specific branch of anxiety therapy, which is part of my psychotherapy.
When should I come to you about intrusive thoughts?
Come when the thoughts have started to change how you live: what you avoid, who you are alone with, how you sleep or how you see yourself. It is fine to come while you are still coping on the outside. Your own sense that you cannot carry this alone is reason enough.
In more than 22 years of practice, I have learned to look at how long the thoughts have been there, how much ground they have taken and what life change may have set them off. If the cycle has lasted for weeks and keeps growing, it deserves proper attention. My article on intrusive thoughts is a calm place to start reading.
Do my thoughts mean I am dangerous?
No. In my experience, the people most tormented by thoughts of harm are usually among the least likely to act on them. The thought frightens you precisely because it goes against what you care about. I cannot promise how quickly the fear will ease, and I do not offer quick fixes. I can help you understand it and loosen its hold.
In my clinical experience, the turning point often comes when someone says the thought out loud for the first time and sees that the listener is still there and still calm. I would focus with you on what the thought has latched on to and what keeps it returning.
Will you be shocked by what I tell you?
No. I have heard a great many frightening thoughts over the years, and I will not react with alarm or judgement. You also decide how much detail to share and when. Some people describe the theme first and the content later.
My professional position is that shame is one of the main things keeping intrusive thoughts alive. I help you bring them into a calm room, look at them together and see them for what they are. Most people feel lighter after the first honest conversation.
Why do I keep checking and asking for reassurance, or hiding it completely?
Both are ways of trying to feel safe. Some people check, ask and search until the doubt goes quiet for a while. Others hide the thoughts completely and handle them alone. Many do both, depending on the day and on who is nearby. None of this is a flaw in your character.
I help you recognise which way you tend to move, what it is trying to achieve and what it costs you and the people close to you. Then we work on steadier options: allowing the doubt without answering it, sharing what you need without confessing everything and settling yourself without waiting for someone else to do it.
What will we do in the first session?
We start with what is happening now. I ask what the thoughts are like in general terms, what you do when they come and what you have started to avoid. I also ask a little about when it began and about your family, because these thoughts often have a context. Before the hour is over, I tell you how I understand the cycle so far and where I suggest we start.
You do not need to prepare or to be ready to say everything. Many people arrive dreading the session itself, and that is fine. If you want to begin, book your first session, or try a free discovery call if a full session feels like too much for now.
How many sessions will I need for intrusive thoughts?
My recommendation is to plan for a course of sessions over a few months, usually weekly at first. That is often enough to understand the cycle and take back much of what you have been avoiding. Thoughts that have been with you for many years, or that are tied to older experiences, usually need longer.
Based on more than 22 years of practice, I would rather you commit to a clear first stretch and review it honestly than stop the moment the fear eases a little. At that point we look at how much ground you have taken back, and we agree whether to carry on, meet less often or end.
Should I come in person or online?
Both work well for intrusive thoughts. Some people find it easier to say difficult things from their own home, others need the separate, calm space of my practice to feel safe enough. Online sessions last just as long and suit you if you live outside Copenhagen or have a small baby at home.
In my room or on your screen, the psychotherapy is the same depth of work, in English or Danish. If you cannot decide, we can weigh it up on a free call first.
What does intrusive thoughts therapy with you cost?
Sessions are 1-hour appointments of individual psychotherapy, with 50 minutes of therapy in each. The current price is on my prices page, kept up to date. Payment is by invoice and bank transfer.
Because loosening this cycle usually takes a number of weeks, a bundle can help: it saves 10 per cent and fixes the plan in advance. Read more on therapy discounts and bundles. Paying the invoice the same day from a Danish bank account takes off a further 3 per cent.
How do I book intrusive thoughts therapy with you?
Choose a time and book your first session online, or ask for a free 30-minute discovery call if you want to hear how I respond before you commit. You do not need to write anything about the thoughts themselves.
If you cannot find a time that suits you, or the thoughts feel overwhelming right now, contact me directly. I keep a little space free each week for people who need to be seen quickly, so a time within days is usually possible. Book the session, and you will not be carrying this alone any more.
You can also send me an email
My approach and values
My mission
My mission is to help individuals, couples and families rediscover connection, communicate with understanding, and build a stronger, more loving relationship that can thrive through any challenge.
My vision
My vision is to create a world where every person in my therapy room feels supported, connected, and empowered to grow, and to step one step closer to your Self.
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