In this short video, I explain how I help couples understand distress without treating different ways of processing as relationship failure.
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AuDHD couples therapy Copenhagen is focused relationship support when communication differences, sensory overload or repeated misunderstanding have become a serious difficulty.
I help both of you understand the cycle, reduce unnecessary demands and create agreements that respect each person’s capacity and responsibility.
You can request a free discovery call, book a session with me, review my client policy or contact me directly.
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I am Mark Colclough, MA, a psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist specialising in expats and international couples. I work in English and Danish, from my practice in central Copenhagen and online.
Practising since 2004, I bring a bicultural perspective to work with individuals and couples across languages and cultural contexts. My work integrates depth-oriented psychotherapy with approaches such as integral psychotherapy, Gestalt therapy, Jungian psychoanalysis, and object relations theory. I also have specialist training in attachment theory, narcissism, and borderline personality disorder.
For support with life between cultures, explore expat psychotherapy or expat couples therapy. My practice is supported by ongoing training and supervision. To read more about my background, training, and approach, visit About me.
I regularly meet with experienced senior psychotherapists in Denmark and abroad to reflect on my work, challenge my thinking, and continue developing my skills. This ongoing process supports the quality of my individual and couples therapy, helping me offer thoughtful, ethical, and effective care.
My focus is simple: excellence, integrity, and impact.
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You are welcome to get in touch. We can clarify what’s the right therapy for you.
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You care about each other, but overload, hidden expectations or repeated misunderstanding has made the relationship feel increasingly difficult.
You need this service when ordinary conversations repeatedly end in escalation, shutdown or confusion and neither of you can find a workable way back. You do not need matching diagnoses or perfect language. If the relationship is no longer functioning as either of you needs, that is enough reason to act.
In more than 21 years of practice, I have learned that couples need their actual pattern understood rather than forced into a standard script. I identify what is overloading each partner, which meanings are being missed and what must change immediately.
Noise, disrupted routines, work, parenting and unfinished tasks can accumulate until one additional request becomes impossible. The resulting reaction may look disproportionate when the earlier load remains invisible.
I help you identify the build-up and agree what must be reduced, postponed or communicated earlier. If the difficulty is already governing daily life, book an AuDHD couples session with me.
One partner may focus on literal words while the other expects tone, context or indirect cues to carry the emotional meaning. Both can leave the conversation convinced that the other person refused to listen.
I slow the exchange down, make meanings explicit and separate intention from impact. Clear communication must replace tests that depend on mind-reading.
Changes in plans, tone or availability can create intense uncertainty. Repeated questions may be an attempt to find the missing detail rather than a refusal to accept an answer.
I help you identify what remains unclear and ask for reassurance in a specific, workable form. The other partner learns to respond without being made responsible for eliminating every uncertainty.
A partner may lose words, become highly factual or need complete distance when emotional and sensory demands exceed capacity. The withdrawal may protect against further overload while feeling like abandonment to the other person.
I help you recognise earlier signs, communicate the need for a pause and agree exactly when contact resumes. Space must protect regulation without becoming disappearance.
One partner may appear capable while using enormous energy to accommodate routines, social demands or communication expectations. When that effort finally collapses, the change can seem sudden and unfair.
I help you make invisible labour and hidden needs discussable. Both partners must be able to ask for accommodation without one person carrying the entire relationship.
You may no longer know whether the difficulty reflects incompatible needs or a relationship organised around unclear expectations and chronic overload.
I help you test what changes through direct communication, realistic accommodation and responsibility. The aim is an informed decision, not pressure to remain together at any cost.
If you want to understand the pattern between you, request a call or book a couples session with me.
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Your journey is unique, and you do not have to walk it alone.
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Support when you need it most.
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Understanding AuDHD matters, but our work must also change how you communicate, share demands and repair disconnection.
I help you understand how processing, sensory load, executive strain and masking affect the cycle between you. We translate insight into clearer requests, boundaries, routines and repair.
My role is active and structured. I will challenge mind-reading, chronic self-sacrifice and behaviour that causes harm. AuDHD can explain a difficulty without removing responsibility for its impact.
The central difficulty may concern trust, loneliness or unequal responsibility, while AuDHD-related differences intensify how it is communicated and experienced.
I separate the relationship injury from the conditions surrounding it. This prevents both blaming AuDHD for everything and ignoring adjustments that could genuinely help.
Yes. Both partners can learn the earlier signs of reduced language, rising urgency, sensory strain or narrowing tolerance.
I help you build a shared pause plan that states what happens, how long the break lasts and how contact resumes. Regulation becomes a relationship responsibility rather than a private emergency.
Yes. We make requests, limits and emotional meanings explicit rather than relying on hints that one partner may not perceive or interpret as intended.
I help you remain direct without becoming cold and emotional without becoming vague. Clear language protects intimacy when assumptions repeatedly fail.
Yes. Accommodation should remove unnecessary barriers while preserving the needs, dignity and agency of both partners. It is not an exemption from every difficult conversation.
I help you agree what should change, who is responsible and how the arrangement will be reviewed. A workable relationship cannot depend on one partner disappearing.
Repair begins when intention and impact can be held together. A partner may not have intended rejection, but the loneliness or hurt created still needs recognition.
I structure the conversation so responsibility does not become shame and explanation does not become dismissal. Repair requires both understanding and visible behavioural change.
A sustainable relationship may require clearer routines, explicit expectations, protected recovery time and a fairer distribution of planning and emotional labour.
I help you decide what must change and how progress will be recognised. The goal is not to make both partners function alike, but to build a relationship that can hold both realities.
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You do not need matching diagnoses or perfect words. I begin with the pattern happening between you now.
I listen to both of you, identify the focused cycle and adapt language, pace and structure so that each partner can participate. I ask what overload, processing and communication mean in this specific relationship.
One partner may continue through structured individual psychotherapy with me, while sustained relational work can continue through long-term couples therapy with me. For continuity and savings, consider a structured therapy bundle.
I ask what brought the difficulty to this point, how each partner experiences the cycle and what makes the conversation difficult to sustain.
Before the session ends, I offer an initial formulation and clear priorities. You should understand what is happening and what each of you needs to practise next.
I can slow the pace, clarify questions, make turn-taking explicit and allow additional processing time. Either partner may request a pause or clarification.
Adaptation removes barriers without lowering responsibility. Both partners still need to listen, communicate impact and participate in change.
Our work should become longer-term therapy when the difficulty has stabilised but trust, communication, accommodation or recurring injuries still require sustained attention.
You can continue through long-term relational work with me. Containing the emergency is not the same as building a sustainable relationship.
Sessions may need enough frequency to maintain continuity when changing demands, executive strain or recovery needs make long gaps unhelpful.
I recommend the pace the difficulty requires and tell you when work can become less frequent. The schedule should support the relationship rather than create dependency.
A structured plan provides predictability when the difficulty requires more than one conversation and knowing the schedule reduces unnecessary uncertainty.
A planned therapy bundle can provide significant savings and continuity. I recommend one only when it serves a clear purpose.
The the focused work has done its job when the cycle is contained enough for you to communicate and decide without repeatedly returning to emergency.
You may then stop, attend less frequently or continue with long-term work. I help you make that transition deliberately.
It is focused relationship support when communication differences, sensory load, executive strain or masking are relevant to an recurring relationship difficulty.
I work with the lived pattern between you without requiring matching diagnoses or treating either partner as the problem.
Come when repeated misunderstanding, overload or shutdown is affecting daily life and ordinary conversations are making the difficulty worse.
You do not need to wait for a final rupture. If the relationship no longer feels workable, I recommend beginning now.
No. You can discuss experiences related to autism, ADHD or other ways of processing without formal diagnoses.
I work with what each of you experiences and needs rather than requiring either partner to prove that they belong to a category.
Yes. We identify what happens before speech, tolerance or emotional availability disappears and create a clear plan for pausing.
The person who needs space remains responsible for communicating and returning. The other partner learns how to allow recovery without being abandoned.
Yes. We identify the uncertainty and emotional need beneath repeated questions and the overwhelm beneath the other partner’s withdrawal.
I help you create reassurance that is specific and sustainable without making one partner responsible for eliminating every uncertainty.
I begin with the focused difficulty, hear both experiences and map the cycle in clear language.
By the end, I aim to give you an initial understanding and practical priorities for both partners.
Yes. Online work can be effective when both partners have privacy, reliable access and a sensory environment that supports participation.
I help you decide whether online or in-person sessions fit the present difficulty.
One session may provide direction, but established overload or repeated relational injury normally requires continuity.
I give you a clear recommendation and review progress openly. Therapy continues because it is useful.
The current fees are available when you book an AuDHD couples session with me. Payment may be made by invoice and bank transfer or, where offered, by card through Stripe. The total amount payable is shown before you confirm payment.
If continued work is appropriate, a structured therapy bundle can provide significant savings and continuity.
Book an AuDHD couples session with me and briefly tell me what feels most important.
If the available times do not reflect the difficulty, contact me directly.
You can also send me an email
My mission is to help individuals, couples and families rediscover connection, communicate with understanding, and build a stronger, more loving relationship that can thrive through any challenge.
My vision is to create a world where every person in my therapy room feels supported, connected, and empowered to grow, and to step one step closer to your Self.
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P.S. I’ll call you in a bit!
