Anger management for men Copenhagen
Get your temper under your own control, not the other way round
I help you understand your anger and use your strength without doing harm
- Last updated October 18, 2026
What I want you to know about your temper
In this short video, I explain why I treat a man’s anger as something to understand and put to good use, not only something to hold down, and what that means for your first sessions.
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At a glance
Anger management for men Copenhagen helps men whose temper is costing them at home, at work or on the road, and who want to understand it and change how they act. I offer this as psychotherapy, not as a course or a programme. You meet me on your own, in 1-hour appointments with 50 minutes of therapy, in English or Danish, at my practice in central Copenhagen or online.
If someone is being hurt or is frightened of you, safety comes first, and we start there. Then I help you see what sets your anger off, what lies underneath it and how to keep your strength while losing the damage. This page is a main branch of my psychotherapy for men.
You can request a free discovery call, book a session, read my client policy or contact me directly.
Is this the right page for you?
This is for you if…
Anger management for men Copenhagen is for men whose anger has started to frighten them, or the people around them, more than it helps. You may be a good father, a hard worker and a loyal friend, and still go from calm to furious in seconds. You want to understand why, and to stay in charge of what you do with it.
- You shout at another driver on the motorway, then sit shaking at the next red light, embarrassed by yourself.
- You have punched a door, thrown your phone or kicked something, and the look on your family’s faces stays with you.
- You snap at your children over small things and then lie awake replaying it, promising yourself it will not happen again.
- You come home from work already wound tight, and the smallest comment from your partner sets you off.
- You need a few beers or a hard session at the gym before you feel calm enough to be around people.
- You feel a hot rush when someone talks down to you, and you struggle to let it go for days.
- Your partner or a friend has told you, carefully, that people are starting to walk on eggshells around you.
- You are tired of apologising for the same thing, and you want to change for real rather than just try harder.
This is probably not for you if…
Anger shows up in different ways, and some of them need a different starting point. If one of these sounds more like you, the linked page will serve you better.
- The irritability comes with a flat, heavy mood, and nothing feels worth the effort any more. → depression in men
- You swallow everything for months, and the anger only comes out after a long silence. → conflict avoidance in men
- Anger is one theme among several, and you want to look at your life as a man more broadly. → psychotherapy for men
- Your anger is mostly in your relationship, and you want to work on yourself as a partner. → therapy for men in relationships
- Your temper shows most with your children, and being the father you want to be is the focus. → therapy for fathers
- Something serious has happened this week, and you need help within days. → acute psychotherapy
- The anger has come with a midlife sense that your life is not what you expected it to be. → midlife crisis therapy for men
- You are in immediate danger, or you are thinking about ending your life. Please call 112, or 1813 for urgent mental health help in the Capital Region.
You can also send me an email
Client reviews
The reviews shown here are shared by clients who have worked with me in therapy and chosen to reflect on their experience. They are collected via Google and displayed through an independent verification service, offering an open and transparent picture of how my work is experienced.
Mark’s view
“Since I began studying men’s work in 2010, I have become convinced that most angry men do not need to become less strong. They need their strength to have a direction. Many of them have been told to calm down their whole lives, and it has not worked. What I see is force with no purpose behind it, fighting whatever happens to be in front of it: a driver, a child, a partner, himself. Underneath the heat I often hear ‘Does anyone here actually respect me?’ and, just as loud, ‘Leave me alone until I have cooled off.’ When a man finds what his anger is trying to protect, he can protect it without destroying anything.”
Mark Colclough, MA, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
Meet Mark, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
I am Mark Colclough, MA, a psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist specialising in expats and international couples. I work in English and Danish, from my practice in central Copenhagen and online.
Practising since 2004, I bring a bicultural perspective to work with individuals and couples across languages and cultural contexts. My work integrates depth-oriented psychotherapy with approaches such as integral psychotherapy, Gestalt therapy, Jungian psychoanalysis, and object relations theory. I also have specialist training in attachment theory, narcissism, and borderline personality disorder.
For support with life between cultures, explore expat psychotherapy or expat couples therapy. My practice is supported by ongoing training and supervision. To read more about my background, training, and approach, visit About me.
The importance of supervision
Good therapy begins with good supervision
I regularly meet with experienced senior psychotherapists in Denmark and abroad to reflect on my work, challenge my thinking, and continue developing my skills. This ongoing process supports the quality of my individual and couples therapy, helping me offer thoughtful, ethical, and effective care.
My focus is simple: excellence, integrity, and impact.
Connect with me:
If you want me to call you ASAP, or if you want to book me, use the buttons below.
You are welcome to get in touch. We can clarify what’s the right therapy for you.
You can also send me an email
A typical situation
Mikkel is 41 and runs a small building firm on Amager. A client has not paid for 3 months, an apprentice keeps making mistakes and the van broke down last week. On Thursday he shouted at the apprentice in front of a customer. That evening, when his partner asked about the bills, he slammed his fist into the kitchen cupboard. Nobody was hurt, but his partner said quietly that she was frightened. He has not slept properly since.
I would start with safety: what Mikkel will do the next time he feels it rising, so nobody at home is afraid. Then we would look at Thursday slowly. In our first session, he would probably see how much pressure and shame he carries about the business, and how quickly that turns into heat.
I have presented this clinical example as a compound of 22 years of clinical practice.
This is when you need help with your anger
You have promised yourself many times that it will not happen again, and it keeps happening.
There is no single right time to deal with your temper, and no reason too small. If your temper is affecting the people you love, your work or your own peace of mind, that is reason enough. You do not need a diagnosis, a court order or a disaster first. In 22 years of practice, I have sat with many men who were ashamed of their anger, and I know when a short fuse has become a pattern that needs proper work.
In sessions, I usually begin with one recent outburst, slowly, from the first moment of tension. I will tell you clearly what I see. These 6 questions can help you judge whether your temper needs work now.
Is your temper costing you at work, on the road or at home?
If it is, take it seriously. Maybe a colleague has stopped telling you things, your children go quiet when you come in, or you have had a near miss in traffic. You may spend energy every day keeping a lid on it, and feel exhausted and on edge by the evening.
I would look at where the anger shows up, how often and what usually comes just before it. That tells us whether you are under heavy pressure for a while or living with a pattern that will keep repeating. If this sounds like your week, book a session with me.
Does part of you feel the anger is justified while another part is ashamed of it?
Both can be true, because they protect different things. The angry part often has a point: something was unfair, someone did not listen. The ashamed part sees the cost, the frightened faces and the broken trust. You may swing between defending yourself and hating yourself, which leaves no room to change.
I do not treat either part as the enemy. The anger often carries something important, and the shame shows that you care. I help you hear what each part is protecting, so that you can keep the message of the anger while changing how you deliver it.
Does feeling ignored or disrespected light the fuse?
For many men it does. Being talked over in a meeting, a partner looking at their phone while you speak or a client who treats you as if you do not count can set off a rush of heat. Underneath there is often a fear of not mattering, which can feel unbearable, so anger arrives instead.
Your need to be respected and taken seriously is legitimate, and I will not shame it. I help you notice the alarm sooner, recognise the hurt that is driving it and ask for respect directly, before the heat speaks for you.
Do you want your family near you, then snap the moment they come close?
That swing is common. You come home wanting warmth and quiet, and when your children rush at you or your partner starts talking, you feel crowded and snap. Then you feel guilty and try to make up for it, until the next time you feel hemmed in.
I help you see the moment closeness starts to feel like pressure, and what it touches in you. I have compassion for that reaction, and I will also ask you to take responsibility for the outbursts, so you can ask for a few minutes to land instead of pushing people away.
Do you disappear into the gym, a screen or a few beers to keep from exploding?
Many men do. When feelings or other people’s demands rise, you take yourself off: a long run, hours of gaming, a drink to take the edge off. It works for a while, and it keeps people safe from your temper. The cost is that nobody, including you, gets to know what is actually going on.
I will not shame you for needing space. Taking yourself away before you explode is better than exploding. I help you understand what the retreat protects, and to say clearly when you need time out and when you will come back, so that distance does not become a wall.
Is your anger tied up with how much you have to achieve and prove?
Often it is. When your worth depends on performing, earning and winning, every setback feels like a threat to who you are. Sam Keen’s “Fire in the Belly” describes how a man’s identity gets bound up with work, achievement and competition, and how much feeling, friendship and care get squeezed out. Anger can be what is left.
I help you look at what you are trying to prove and to whom, without handing you a new identity. I will challenge you when you measure yourself only by results, and I will help you work out what kind of life, work and relationships fit the man you want to be.
If you recognise yourself here, a free call is a quiet way to start, or you can book a session now.
You can also send me an email
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What working on your anger with me will help you do
Understanding your anger matters, but the real test is the next time you feel it rise.
Working on your anger with me will help you see what sets it off, understand the patterns that keep it going and change how you act when it rises. Insight helps, but if nothing changes at home or at work, it is not enough.
I take an active part. I will tell you what I see, give you concrete things to practise and challenge you when you excuse what happened. Psychotherapy is my core training, and I have also been a student of men’s work since 2010, which has added to and deepened that training. Eli Buren, a dear friend and mentor, has been a central influence, and I have sat in his work many times. Here I draw on Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette’s “King, Warrior, Magician, Lover”, where the Warrior is a man’s capacity to act and hold a boundary, and its shadow is force that turns cruel or turns against himself. These 6 questions describe what we work towards.
How will I help you find out what your anger is answering?
I help you separate the anger from what is feeding it. Often there is stress, tiredness or drinking around it, and at its centre a feeling that is harder to show: humiliation, fear, grief or a sense of failing the people you love.
I will give you my honest view of what is going on and challenge explanations such as “I just have a short fuse”. We look at where the pattern began, often with a father who exploded or a home where anger was the only feeling allowed. When you are ready to look at it, book a session with me.
How can you feel the heat rising before you say or do something you regret?
You can learn to catch it early. There is nearly always a build-up: clenched jaw, hot face, faster breathing, a particular thought such as “here we go again”. Once you know your own signals, you have a moment to act differently.
In sessions, I help you slow down a recent outburst and map it step by step. Then we agree on what you will do at the first signal, such as stepping outside or saying “I need 10 minutes”, and you practise it until it becomes automatic.
How can you bring your body down from boiling point?
Calming down does not mean swallowing your anger or pretending you are fine. It means staying present enough to choose what you do. Anger is fast and physical, so the first work is with the body, not the argument.
I help you notice activation sooner and find ways to settle that fit you, from breathing and movement to simply leaving the room in time. I will also be clear that you must practise between sessions. My article on how to process emotions has more on what happens in the body.
How can you be firm and still be safe to be around?
Being firm begins with knowing what you feel and need, and saying it while it is still small. Many angry men say nothing for too long, then say everything at once and too loud. Others go silent and cold, which can be just as frightening for the people at home.
I help you find words that are clear, specific and proportionate. A mature Warrior holds a line without attacking anyone. I will challenge you when you bottle things up, and also when you expect others to manage your mood for you.
How can you stop anger from making your decisions for you?
Better decisions come when you separate the heat of the moment from what you actually think and value. Quitting a job, ending a friendship or sending that email can all feel right in anger and wrong a day later.
I help you look at the decision once you are calm, consider the consequences and choose what you can stand behind. I will give you my view, and I will name it when anger is doing the deciding, but the choice is yours.
What does it look like when your strength serves you instead of scaring people?
It looks like a man people can rely on. You still feel anger, and you still stand up for what matters, but your family is not bracing for you. You may need new routines: a buffer after work, less alcohol, more sleep, and a friend or 2 you can actually talk to.
I help you work out what has to change and what can stay. Your drive, your sense of fairness and your protectiveness are not the problem. The aim is for them to serve your values, so you can be strong without leaving damage behind.
You can also send me an email
What happens when you begin working on your anger with me
You do not need to explain yourself well or justify anything. We start with what happened most recently.
When you begin, I listen, check that everyone at home is safe and help you name the central pattern. I give the work a clear direction from the first session. I do not need a diagnosis or a full history first.
This is part of my psychotherapy, structured individual work on how you feel and act. If the anger lives in your relationship, nobody is frightened and your partner wants to come, couples therapy offers long-term relational development and healing. If you know you want a series of sessions, my therapy discounts and bundles give you savings and a fixed plan.
What happens in our first session about anger?
I ask what brought you now, what the anger looks like, who is affected, what you have tried and what you want to be different. If anyone feels unsafe, we agree first on what you will do when you feel it rising. You do not need to tell me your whole life story.
By the end, I tell you how I understand your anger and where I would start, and you decide whether my approach suits you. If you want to talk it through before booking, request a free 30-minute discovery call.
When is individual therapy the right choice for anger?
Individual therapy is right when the anger lives in you, whoever it lands on. It usually started long before your current job or relationship, so you can work on it without anyone else in the room. It is also the right first step if anyone has been frightened or hurt.
I keep the work on track from session to session and challenge you honestly when you start making excuses. Psychotherapy Copenhagen explains how this fits my structured individual work.
When is couples therapy a better choice?
Couples therapy can help once nobody is afraid, when the relationship itself needs sustained work: the same fights keep returning, trust has worn thin or you are stuck in a cycle of attack and retreat.
In couples work, I help you both see the cycle, own your parts and build safer ways of being together. Couples therapy Copenhagen is long-term relational development and healing, and many men do individual work on their anger first.
How often should you come?
It depends on how serious things are and what is at stake. If the anger is frightening people now, closer sessions at the start make sense.
I usually recommend weekly sessions at first, then every second week once things are steadier. I will tell you honestly if the gaps are too long, or when we can space them out. A short run of back-to-back sessions is also possible when you need a firm start.
When does a bundle make sense?
A bundle makes sense when you know you need a series of sessions and want to commit, rather than deciding after each one. When the people at home are watching whether you mean it, a planned series of sessions shows that you do.
For this work, a bundle offers significant savings and a structured plan. I can help you judge the likely scope, and you will find the options on therapy discounts and bundles.
How will we know when the work is done?
The work is done when you can feel anger without acting it out, when the people close to you are no longer wary and when you trust yourself under pressure without me in the background.
I review progress openly and do not encourage dependency. Sessions can space out, pause or end when the work has done its job, and returning later with something new is not a sign that it failed.
How it works with me
- Choose a free 30-minute call or book your first session online. Tell me briefly what has been happening, and whether anyone at home feels unsafe.
- We first meet for a 1-hour appointment with 50 minutes of therapy, one to one, at Møntergade 4 in central Copenhagen or online, in English or Danish. I offer times from 08:00 to 21:00 Copenhagen time, 7 days a week, subject to availability.
- At first we meet weekly, with a clear plan for what you do when the anger rises. You practise it between sessions, and we go through what happened.
- Every few sessions we review what has changed at home and at work, and decide together whether to keep the pace, space sessions out or finish.
- If you expect several sessions, a therapy bundle saves you 10 per cent and gives you a clear plan from the start. You can see the bundles just below.
Save with a prepaid session bundle
How the bundle works
- Current bundle savings are shown on the Pricing page.
- Your bundle is valid for 180 days from the date of purchase.
- The bundle can only be used for the type of session stated on your invoice.
- If you request a refund, sessions already used are recalculated at the standard single-session price.
- The administration fee applied to a bundle refund is shown on the Pricing page.
- VAT follows the type of therapy included in the bundle: VAT-exempt sessions remain VAT exempt, while VAT-liable sessions include applicable VAT.
Compare with nearby options
Not sure this is where to start? Here is how it compares with the nearest options.
| Option | Choose it when | Pace |
|---|---|---|
| Anger management for men (this page) | Your temper is costing you, and you want to understand and change it. | Weekly 1-hour sessions at first |
| Depression in men | Irritability sits on top of low mood, numbness or exhaustion. | 1-hour sessions, weekly at first |
| Therapy for men in relationships | You want to work on yourself as a partner more widely. | 1-hour sessions at a pace you choose |
| Psychotherapy for men | Anger is one of several things you want to look at. | 1-hour sessions over months |
Frequently asked questions
What is anger management with you?
It is individual psychotherapy for men whose temper is causing harm or fear. I do not run an anger management course, a group or a programme with set modules. We work on what triggers your anger, what lies underneath it and how you act, in English or Danish, in central Copenhagen or online.
My page on anger therapy is for anyone whose anger costs them, while this page is about men, and about how anger so often becomes the one feeling a man allows himself to show. It belongs to my psychotherapy for men as a main branch.
When should I come to you about my temper?
Come when your anger is frightening the people around you, damaging your work or leaving you ashamed, or when you keep promising to change and do not. You do not need to wait for something worse. Your own concern is reason enough.
In 22 years of practice, I have learned to look at how often it happens, who it lands on and whether it is getting worse. If you want to read first, my article on why you might feel so angry is a good place to start.
Can therapy help if I have always had a short fuse?
Yes, it often can, although I cannot promise how fast. A lifelong temper is usually learned, often from a parent who exploded or a home where nobody dealt with feelings at all. What was learned can be understood and changed with steady work.
In my clinical experience, men who have been angry for as long as they remember often find a lot of old hurt under it. I would focus with you on safety and new habits first, and then on what the anger has been guarding all these years.
What if someone at home is frightened of me, or it has got physical?
Then safety comes first, and I will say so plainly. If someone is being hurt or is frightened of you, the first task is to stop that, and we agree on concrete steps you will take before anything else.
I work with you on the anger and what lies under it, and I hold you responsible for your actions without treating you as a monster. If there has been violence in your relationship, couples therapy is not the right first step, and individual work comes first.
Why do I blow up over small things and then feel terrible?
Because the small thing is rarely the real thing. Pressure, tiredness and unspoken hurt build up, and a spilt drink or a late reply releases all of it. Afterwards the shame arrives, which often makes you more irritable, not less.
I help you see what is building up and deal with it earlier, so it does not all come out at once. We also work on the shame, because a man who hates himself after every outburst rarely finds it easier to change.
What will we actually do in the first session?
We talk about what has happened recently, who is affected and what you want to be different. If needed, we agree on a safety plan for the coming week. I may ask a little about anger in the family you grew up in. By the end, you will know how I see your anger and what I suggest next.
You do not need to prepare or present yourself well. When you have decided to deal with it, book your first session or start with a free discovery call.
How many sessions will I need?
I usually recommend a first series of weekly sessions over a couple of months. That gives enough time to put safety habits in place and start on what lies underneath. Anger tied to old trauma or heavy drinking usually takes longer.
From 22 years of practice, I find a clear first stretch with an honest review works better than vague open-ended therapy. We look at what has changed at home and at work, and agree on what comes next.
My partner says I need anger management. Do we come together?
No, come on your own first. Many men come because a partner, a friend or an employer has said something, and that is a fine reason to start. This is your work, and you will do it more honestly without someone you have hurt sitting beside you.
Later, if nobody is afraid and you both want it, couples therapy can be a next step. If you are unsure about the format, we can talk it over on a free call.
What does it cost to work on my anger with you?
Individual psychotherapy is booked in 1-hour appointments with 50 minutes of therapy, and you can see the current price on my prices page. You pay by invoice and bank transfer.
For a planned series, a bundle saves you 10 per cent and gives you a structured plan, set out on therapy discounts and bundles. You save a further 3 per cent by paying the same day from a Danish bank account.
How do I book a first session?
Book a first session online, or ask for a free 30-minute discovery call if you want to talk first.
If things feel urgent or no time suits you, contact me directly. I keep some time free for acute situations, and can usually offer a session within days. Book now, and we start with what happened most recently.
You can also send me an email
My approach and values
My mission
My mission is to help individuals, couples and families rediscover connection, communicate with understanding, and build a stronger, more loving relationship that can thrive through any challenge.
My vision
My vision is to create a world where every person in my therapy room feels supported, connected, and empowered to grow, and to step one step closer to your Self.
Explore other services I offer
Individual psychotherapy
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