Therapy and men’s groups Copenhagen
Individual therapy that works with your men’s group, not against it
I help you take what stirs in the group into deeper one-to-one work
- Last updated October 15, 2026
What I want you to know about therapy and men’s groups
In this short video, I explain how individual therapy and a men’s group can support each other, and how to tell which you need right now.
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At a glance
Therapy and men’s groups Copenhagen helps men who belong to a men’s group or community, or are thinking of joining one, and want individual psychotherapy alongside it. We work one to one in 1-hour appointments with 50 minutes of therapy, in English or Danish, at my practice in central Copenhagen or online.
I help you work through what the group stirs up, prepare for the step of joining, or understand why groups have never felt safe for you. This page sits under therapy for lonely men, within my psychotherapy for men. My general page on loneliness therapy is for anyone who feels alone, while this one is about men, men’s groups and how individual work fits beside them.
To begin, ask for a free discovery call or book a session. My client policy explains the practical terms, and you can always write to me.
Is this the right page for you?
This is for you if…
Therapy and men’s groups Copenhagen is for men who have found, or are looking for, a circle of other men and want a one-to-one space as well. You may already meet with a group to cook, walk or build something, and something has started to move in you. You want to take that further, with a therapist who takes men’s work seriously.
- You joined a men’s group or community this year, and you leave the meetings moved in ways you cannot quite explain.
- Something came up in the circle, about your father, a loss or your anger, and it needs more room than the group can give.
- You keep meaning to join a men’s group but stop at the door, afraid you will not know what to say.
- You find it easier to talk to men while working on something together than sitting face to face being asked how you feel.
- You tried a group once, felt judged or out of place, and have avoided anything like it ever since.
- Your partner has noticed you are more open since you started meeting other men, and you want that change to last.
- You hold back in the group because some of what you carry feels too private or too heavy to say with others listening.
- You want both things: brotherhood with other men, and a steady, confidential place to work on your own history.
This is probably not for you if…
A men’s group is one thing, and some situations call for a different kind of help. If one of these is nearer the mark, the link takes you to the right page.
- Groups are not on your mind at all, and your main struggle is feeling alone and cut off. → therapy for lonely men
- You want to look at your life as a man more broadly, without any group in the picture. → psychotherapy for men
- Your mood has become so heavy or flat that joining anything feels impossible right now. → depression in men
- Something has shaken you badly, in the group or outside it, and you need help this week. → acute psychotherapy
- You want a planned block of individual sessions over a few days rather than a weekly rhythm. → back-to-back psychotherapy
- The group has shown you that your relationship needs work, and your partner is willing to come. → couples therapy
- Being new to Denmark is what makes joining a circle of Danish men feel so hard. → expat psychotherapy
- You are in immediate danger, or you are thinking about ending your life. Please call 112, or 1813 for urgent mental health help in the Capital Region.
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Client reviews
The reviews shown here are shared by clients who have worked with me in therapy and chosen to reflect on their experience. They are collected via Google and displayed through an independent verification service, offering an open and transparent picture of how my work is experienced.
Mark’s view
“Looking back over my 22 years of practice, I believe a men’s group and individual therapy do different jobs, and men often expect one to do the work of the other. A good circle gives you witness and belonging. It rarely has time for the slow, private work on why your father’s silence still lives in your chest. In the group, part of you is asking ‘Do these men actually want me here?’, while another part says ‘I will listen, but my own story stays with me.’ Some men feel both at once: ‘Let me in, and do not come any closer.’ You deserve both spaces, and each makes the other stronger.”
Mark Colclough, MA, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
Meet Mark, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
I am Mark Colclough, MA, a psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist specialising in expats and international couples. I work in English and Danish, from my practice in central Copenhagen and online.
Practising since 2004, I bring a bicultural perspective to work with individuals and couples across languages and cultural contexts. My work integrates depth-oriented psychotherapy with approaches such as integral psychotherapy, Gestalt therapy, Jungian psychoanalysis, and object relations theory. I also have specialist training in attachment theory, narcissism, and borderline personality disorder.
For support with life between cultures, explore expat psychotherapy or expat couples therapy. My practice is supported by ongoing training and supervision. To read more about my background, training, and approach, visit About me.
The importance of supervision
Good therapy begins with good supervision
I regularly meet with experienced senior psychotherapists in Denmark and abroad to reflect on my work, challenge my thinking, and continue developing my skills. This ongoing process supports the quality of my individual and couples therapy, helping me offer thoughtful, ethical, and effective care.
My focus is simple: excellence, integrity, and impact.
Connect with me:
If you want me to call you ASAP, or if you want to book me, use the buttons below.
You are welcome to get in touch. We can clarify what’s the right therapy for you.
You can also send me an email
A typical situation
Lukas is 46, a carpenter and father of 2 teenagers, living in Valby. A friend took him along to a men’s community that meets on Tuesday evenings to repair bikes and cook together. For months he mostly fixed brakes and listened. Then one evening another man spoke about his father’s drinking, and Lukas had to go outside. He has not been back for 3 weeks, and he does not know whether he is ashamed or relieved.
I would start with that evening, and what Lukas felt in his body before he walked out. In our first session, he would probably see that the other man’s story touched something of his own he has never said aloud. That gives us a reason to work one to one, and very likely a way back to the group.
I have presented this clinical example as a compound of 22 years of clinical practice.
This is when you need one-to-one therapy with me as well as a group
The group has opened something in you, and you are carrying more of it home than you can hold alone.
There is no right time or right reason to add individual therapy to a men’s group, and you do not need a crisis. If something has been stirred and not settled, if you keep yourself back in the circle, or if you cannot bring yourself to join one at all, that is reason enough. In 22 years of practice, I have seen how often group experiences open doors that need a quieter room to walk through.
In sessions, I usually begin by helping you see what the group touches in you, what you are protecting and what needs to change. Use the 6 questions below to check whether a one-to-one space would help you now.
Do you leave group evenings more unsettled than when you arrived?
If that keeps happening, take it seriously. You may sleep badly after a meeting, replay what someone said or feel raw for a couple of days. Something real is being touched, and it is spilling into your ordinary life.
I would look at what exactly is being stirred, whether it is new or very old, and whether it settles or keeps building. That tells us whether this is the healthy discomfort of growth or a wound that needs focused attention. If this is familiar, book a session with me and we will look at it.
Do you want to belong to a group of men and also fear it?
Both can be true, because they protect different needs. Part of you longs for the company of men who understand, perhaps something you never had with your father or brothers. Another part remembers the playground, the changing room or national service, where being one of the men meant hiding anything soft. So you are drawn to the circle and keep one foot outside it.
I will not treat either side as the problem. I help you hear what the longing wants and what the fear remembers, so you can decide how close to go and at what pace. The aim is to choose from strength rather than from old fear.
Do you worry the other men think less of you after you have spoken?
Many men do, especially after their first honest share. On the way home you replay every word and wonder whether you said too much or sounded weak. At the next meeting you watch faces, and if someone is quieter than usual you assume it is about you.
Wanting to be accepted by other men is one of the oldest needs there is. I help you calm the alarm that reads rejection into silence, check your fears against what actually happened and say what you need in the group directly.
Do you go all in with the group and then suddenly pull out?
That pattern is common in men’s work. You throw yourself in, go to every meeting, speak from the heart, and then one evening it is too much. You make excuses, skip a month and feel too embarrassed to return.
I help you slow this down until we can see the moment closeness tips into threat. Often it is the moment another man sees you clearly. I respect that protective reflex, and I will also ask you to take responsibility for leaving without a word. Together we find ways to step back that keep the door open.
Do you keep things light in the group when it gets too personal?
Some men become the joker, the one who makes the coffee or the one who asks good questions of everyone else. When the talk turns emotional, you go practical or check the time. No one would call you withdrawn, and yet nobody in the room really knows you.
This distance is protecting something real, and I will not shame you for it. In one-to-one work you can explore what lies behind it without an audience, and find out how to let more of yourself be seen when you are ready, without exposing more than you choose.
Are you unsure what kind of man you want to be?
Men’s groups often raise that question, sometimes for the first time. Years of meeting other people’s expectations, at work, at home and in the culture you grew up in, can leave you uncertain what is truly yours. It is the beginning of a real question.
I help you examine where your ideas of manhood came from, which still fit and which you carry out of loyalty or fear. Moore and Gillette’s “King, Warrior, Magician, Lover”, with its 4 sides of mature manhood, can be a useful map here, as long as it supports your own answer rather than replacing it. I will challenge you, and I will not hand you a template.
Book a session if the group has already stirred something, or request a free call if you are still deciding.
You can also send me an email
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What therapy alongside a men’s group will help you do
Understanding what the group stirs in you matters, but you also need it to change how you live at home and at work.
Therapy alongside a men’s group will help you understand what the circle opens in you, see the patterns that hold you back with other men and make changes that last beyond the meeting. Without one-to-one work, many men have the same moving experience again and again and go home unchanged.
I have been a student of men’s work since 2010. Eli Buren, a dear friend and mentor, has been a central influence. I have sat in his work many times. I also draw on Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette, Robert Glover, Sam Keen and David Deida. I have used this work to add to and deepen my training as a psychotherapist.
In sessions, I take an active part. I will guide and challenge you rather than simply listen. These 6 questions describe what we work towards.
How will I help you understand what the group is touching in you?
I help you separate the core from the surface. The tears you did not expect, the irritation with one particular man, the urge to leave early: these point to something underneath. Often it is grief, an old hurt with your father or brothers, or a belief that you must prove yourself before other men will accept you.
I give you my honest reading and tell you what deserves attention first. I will also question explanations that keep you stuck, such as ‘that group is just not for me’, when it may be exactly where you need practice. You can book a session with me to start untangling it.
How can you notice yourself closing down in the circle before it happens?
You can learn to notice the early signs. There is usually a sequence: your arms fold, your jaw sets, a thought arrives such as ‘I am not like these men’, and you start planning your exit. Once you can catch the first link, you have a moment to stay, or to say out loud that something is happening.
I help you slow that sequence down and see what triggers it and what it protects. Recognising it is not enough. We practise a different response, you try it at the next meeting, and you bring back what happened.
How can you stay steady when strong feelings come up in front of other men?
Steadiness does not mean holding it all in or appearing calm. It means staying present enough to feel what is happening and choose what to do with it. Many men have only 2 settings in front of others, fully shut or overwhelmed, and there is a lot of room between them.
I help you notice where the feeling starts in your body and how to slow it without switching it off. Men often open up more easily side by side, doing something together, than when asked directly how they feel, and we can use that, for example by walking through what happened step by step. My article on why men often do not talk about their feelings explores this further.
How can you say what you need in the group without apologising?
It begins with knowing what you feel, what you need and what is yours to carry. In a group, many men either say nothing or say everything at once and regret it. Underneath there is often old shame about needing anything from other men.
I help you find words that are honest and proportionate, so you can tell the group ‘I need more time on this’ or ‘that comment hit me’ without drama. I will challenge you when you silence yourself, and also when you expect the group to hold everything you feel.
How can you decide whether to stay in a group, leave it or find another?
Clearer decisions come when you separate fear, loyalty and habit from what you actually know about the group and about yourself. Some groups are a good fit and simply hard. Others are not right for you, and staying out of politeness costs you.
I help you look honestly at what each option would ask of you and what you might be avoiding. I give you my view, but the decision stays yours. If you feel alone even in the circle, my article on being lonely even with friends may help.
What does it look like when brotherhood becomes part of your life?
Lasting change reaches beyond the group evening. It shows up as a friend you call between meetings, a different way of talking with your partner, more patience with your children or less need to prove yourself at work.
If you are a man who needs a lot of solitude, that is not a problem to fix. The goal is a life with both: time alone that restores you, and men around you who know you.
You can also send me an email
What happens when you begin therapy alongside a men’s group with me
You do not need to explain the group or have your story in order. We start with what is happening for you now.
When you begin, I listen, help you name what the group has brought up or what keeps you from it, and give the work a direction. You do not need to describe the whole history of your group or your life first.
This is a focused form of psychotherapy: structured individual work on your inner life and your relationships, including those with other men. If the group has shown you that your relationship at home needs attention and your partner is willing, couples therapy gives you long-term relational development and healing. For a steady run of sessions, therapy discounts and bundles bring real savings and a plan agreed at the start.
What happens in our first session if I am already in a group?
I ask what brought you to me now, what the group is like, what has stirred in you and what you hope will change. If you are not in a group yet, we talk about what draws you to the idea and what holds you back.
By the end, I give you my first understanding and propose a direction, and you judge whether my way of working is useful to you. If you would rather talk first, book a free 30-minute discovery call.
When should you choose individual therapy instead of only a group?
Individual therapy is the right choice when what needs attention is private, layered or old: your history, a loss, shame you cannot yet say in front of others, or a pattern that keeps repeating.
In individual work, I give you direction and challenge from session to session. My page on Psychotherapy Copenhagen shows how this fits into my one-to-one work more broadly.
When is couples therapy a better choice than individual work?
Choose couples therapy when the relationship itself needs sustained attention. If the changes you are making in the group create tension at home, if your partner feels shut out of this new part of your life, or if the same argument keeps returning, working on it together usually helps more.
In couples work, I help you both understand the cycle you keep repeating, take responsibility for your part and find steadier ways of being together. Couples therapy Copenhagen is long-term relational development and healing.
How often should we meet if I also go to a group?
That depends on what the group stirs and how much room you have.
To begin with, I suggest meeting weekly or every second week. I will tell you if sessions are too far apart to build on what the group opens, and when we can space them out. We can also arrange several sessions back-to-back across a few days.
When does a bundle make sense alongside a group?
A bundle makes sense when you want a run of sessions beside the group and do not want to decide after each one.
With a bundle you get significant savings and the safety of a structured plan. I will help you decide whether one fits. You can compare them on therapy discounts and bundles.
How will we know when the individual work has done its job?
It has done its job when you can be yourself in the group and in the rest of your life, and no longer need a one-to-one space to process each meeting.
I review progress openly and do not encourage dependency. Sessions can become less frequent, pause or end. Returning later with a new question is not a sign that anything failed.
How it works with me
- Start with a free 30-minute call or book a first session. Tell me briefly whether you are in a group already, so I can check that this is the right place to begin.
- The first session is a 1-hour appointment with 50 minutes of therapy, just the 2 of us, at my practice at Møntergade 4 in central Copenhagen or online, in English or Danish. Sessions are available between 08:00 and 21:00 Copenhagen time on every day of the week, subject to availability.
- We usually meet weekly or every second week, and we can fit the rhythm around your group meetings.
- Every few sessions, we look at what has changed, in the group and outside it, and decide together whether to continue, space things out or finish.
- If you expect several sessions, a therapy bundle saves you 10 per cent and gives you a clear plan from the start. You can see the bundles just below.
Save with a prepaid session bundle
How the bundle works
- Current bundle savings are shown on the Pricing page.
- Your bundle is valid for 180 days from the date of purchase.
- The bundle can only be used for the type of session stated on your invoice.
- If you request a refund, sessions already used are recalculated at the standard single-session price.
- The administration fee applied to a bundle refund is shown on the Pricing page.
- VAT follows the type of therapy included in the bundle: VAT-exempt sessions remain VAT exempt, while VAT-liable sessions include applicable VAT.
Compare with nearby options
Is this the right starting point? Compare it with the options men most often consider when a group is part of the picture.
| Option | Choose it when | Pace |
|---|---|---|
| Therapy and men’s groups (this page) | You are in a men’s group, or thinking of joining, and want individual work as well. | Weekly 1-hour sessions beside the group |
| Therapy for lonely men | You feel cut off from friends and want to understand why. | Weekly or every second week |
| Psychotherapy for men | You want to look at your life as a man broadly. | 1-hour sessions at your pace |
| Back-to-back psychotherapy | You want a focused block of individual sessions over a few days. | Several sessions close together |
Frequently asked questions
What is therapy alongside a men’s group with you?
It is individual psychotherapy for men who belong to a men’s group or community, or are considering one, and want a confidential one-to-one space as well. It helps you work through what the group stirs and take the changes into the rest of your life. We can work in English or Danish, face to face in central Copenhagen or online.
I work in depth with your history, your body and the men who shaped you. This page belongs under therapy for lonely men, because for many men a group is part of the way out of isolation.
When should I come to you rather than just talk to the group?
Come when something from the group stays with you for days, when you hold back what matters most, or when an old pain has surfaced that you are not ready to share with a room full of men. Your own sense that you need more room is enough.
In 22 years of practice, I have learned to look at whether the feeling is settling or spreading, and whether it connects to your family or a long-standing pattern. If it keeps returning, it deserves one-to-one attention.
Can you help me if I have never been able to open up to other men?
Yes, often. Many men were taught early that other men are rivals or judges, not friends. I cannot promise how quickly that changes, but I can help you understand where it comes from and practise something different with me first, where the stakes are lower.
In my clinical experience, men who struggle to open up in groups usually have good reasons, often a father, a brother or a school where softness was punished. I would focus with you on those reasons, with respect, and on small steps towards trust.
Is it normal to feel worse after joining a men’s group?
It can be. When a group works, it often touches things you have kept away for years, and the first weeks can feel unsettling. That does not automatically mean the group is wrong for you.
I help you tell the difference between the discomfort of growth and a group that is not safe for you. In recent years, hundreds of men’s communities have started across Denmark, and many meet around a shared activity, so if one does not suit you, another may.
Why do I long for other men’s company and then keep my distance?
Because closeness with other men can feel both necessary and risky. Some men pursue it, join everything and feel hurt when it is not returned. Others hang back, stay polite and leave before anyone gets close. It is how you learned to manage being among men, often at school or at home.
I help you see which way you tend to move and what it costs. Then we practise steadier ways of being with men: speaking up, staying when it gets uncomfortable and stepping back without vanishing.
Do I need to tell you everything that is said in my group?
No. What other men share belongs to them, and I would ask you to keep their confidence. We focus on what you felt, thought and did, and what it touched in your own life. By the end of the first session, you will have my first understanding and a direction.
You do not need to prepare. Book your first session, or start with a free discovery call if you have questions.
How many individual sessions will I need beside the group?
My recommendation is a course over a few months, weekly or every second week, rather than a single conversation. That is usually enough to work through what has surfaced and change how you are in the group.
Drawing on 22 years of practice, I suggest we agree on a first stretch, review it honestly and then decide together how to continue.
Do sessions work as well online as in person?
Mostly, yes, and they last just as long. Still, I recommend coming in person if you can.
Either way, the sessions are part of my psychotherapy practice and can be in English or Danish. Unsure? We can choose the format together on a free call.
What do individual sessions with you cost?
Each session is a 1-hour appointment of individual psychotherapy with 50 minutes of therapy. You can check the current price on my prices page. Payment is made by invoice and bank transfer.
If you plan to come regularly beside your group, a bundle saves you 10 per cent and gives the work a clear shape. See therapy discounts and bundles. When you pay by same-day transfer from a Danish bank account, you save a further 3 per cent.
How do I start sessions with you?
Book a first session directly, or request a free 30-minute call if you would like to ask something first.
If nothing in the calendar fits, or something from the group has shaken you badly, contact me directly. I hold space in my calendar for acute cases, and can usually offer a time within days. Book now, and we begin where you are.
You can also send me an email
My approach and values
My mission
My mission is to help individuals, couples and families rediscover connection, communicate with understanding, and build a stronger, more loving relationship that can thrive through any challenge.
My vision
My vision is to create a world where every person in my therapy room feels supported, connected, and empowered to grow, and to step one step closer to your Self.
Explore other services I offer
Individual psychotherapy
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